Before you go out to look for divorce attorneys, you must understand why you want to go through with the separation.

One of the hardest things to do for most people is to walk away from their marriage. However, if you’ve exhausted all efforts to repair your relationship, then parting ways with your partner may be the best option.

With that being said, some people also think that divorce and speaking with divorce attorneys is the key to solve their marriage problems. They have not tried to fix the relationship or evaluated their specific situation.

In any marriage, experiencing relationship lows are normal and common. However, that doesn’t always mean your best solution is divorce. However, if these issues persist for a long time, you may start questioning if it’s just a simple rough patch or if your relationship is already failing.

The American Psychological Association reported that nearly 50% of married couples in the country hired divorce attorneys and went through with the process.

If you are seriously considering this option, check if you understand why you want it and if the marriage is not worth repairing anymore.

In today’s post, we’ll talk about the essential questions you should be asking yourself before you go and hire divorce attorneys.

Have I communicated my issues and frustrations to my partner?

It may seem simple, but before you choose divorce, make sure that you and your partner are on the same page about the status of your marriage. A common pitfall in any relationship is assuming that your spouse automatically knows what your frustrations are.

Once you assume that they know what’s wrong and yet is not doing anything about it, then that’s when the problem starts escalating. Most married couples consider divorce without even realizing that they were simply just not communicating their issues with each other, to begin with.

Try not to let it get to this point. Communicate with your spouse. Tell him or her what has been bothering you about the relationship. Be direct and honest, but don’t be confrontational.

This way, you and your partner have better chances to make things work – when you know you’re both working towards the same goal.

Am I eager to work to improve my marriage? Is my spouse willing to work on it just as much as I do?

Once you and your partner know the reasons for your relationship troubles, it’s time to ask if you are willing to work on fixing those problems – together.

Whether it’s going to couples counseling, reading up on some marriage advice literature, or taking a couples retreat or couples’ workshop together, you and your spouse must be on the same page when it comes to reconciling your issues.

Whether it’s going to couples counseling, reading up on some marriage advice literature, or taking a couples retreat or couples’ workshop together, you and your spouse must be on the same page when it comes to reconciling your issues.

If your problems stem from a more physical origin such as having low libido resulting in not being intimate with each other, consult with a doctor who can give the right medical advice for your situation.

When you have exhausted all your options through many different avenues, or if neither you or your spouse have no interest in fixing your marriage problems, then it could mean it’s time to employ the services of divorce attorneys.

Am I in an abusive relationship?

Heated discussions with your spouse happen in any marriage. They are common and completely normal. However, if your disagreements involve physically harmful behavior or vile and hurtful comments – no matter if you’re alone or with your family and friends, then those are clear signs that you’re in an abusive relationship.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline states that domestic violence is “behaviors that physically harm, arouse fear, or force a partner to behave in ways that they don’t want.  This type of violence entails physical violence, emotional manipulation, and verbal abuse.

If you’re in an abusive relationship – whether it’s physical, sexual, or emotional – try to get out of it safely as soon as you can. Once you do, then seek divorce attorneys.

How will the divorce affect your children?

How will divorce affect my children?

In many cases, separating from your spouse – if your relationship is not working anymore – is the better option in the long run. Don’t stay in an unhealthy or unhappy marriage because you think it’s the best option for your children.

Children are intuitive. They recognize if their parents are not happy with each other. This type of household is not conducive for a growing child and may negatively affect their development.

Rhonda J. Alessi

Family law attorney in Phoenix, AZ. Married to my fantastic husband George. We are proud owners of our fennec fox, Fifi. Running marathons is my stress reliever. I'm a bookworm and initially wanted to use this domain to sell books online. I later changed my mind and decided to start this blog instead. Then an interesting thought came to me. Why not write about more than one type of law and provide the public with substantial material on the worth of attorneys?